going home

Date: Friday, July 3, 2009
Time: 9:49 AM

replacement or substitute?

i recently realized that you're closer to her now. yea maybe the two of you are of the same ____ and she is more fun, lame, along the same frequency, i guess you have forgotten the times we used to have.

maybe im just too naggy, maybe i say too much. so much that all my words are just like a radio that broadcasts information to its listeners and are forgotten the very next moment. all those times when u stuck to me instead of her, is it because she has someone else? yet now, you two stick to each other, everything goes to her first.

honestly, i feel left out, like i dont belong there anymore. it's just that i have to be there to make the picture complete. sometimes, even when im there, i feel as if im not there. my existence does not matter. this is probably because im getting closer to my class? my class is slightly more fun than the rest? and that im sticking closer to them?

i dont think so you know. as in, i try my best to make time between them and us. so many times they have gone out together, i didnt, i went with you all. in fact, they seem closer themselves while im stuck in the middle between us and them. im neither here nor there. that's why, i think to myself at times, having geng is one of the fortunate things cause when there's no one truly with me, i can rely on him and i know he will be there for me.

but dont you find that 2.5 years of friendship, of which 2 years of hardcore indepth friendship is going to waste? you said we are falling apart. i guess it's starting from us.

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